Monday, June 24, 2024

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OMG! What All Indians Have To Do Before Buying Condoms!

Click “NEXT” to Start…

Trust me, it’s one of the toughest jobs for the people of our country. Something more difficult than rescuing a country from a terrorist attack or flying an airplane. Yes! It’s a fact and WE people have only indulged in this system of ‘too much shyness‘ when it comes to buying ‘Kandooms’(mostly pronounced in India) and are otherwise quite fearless and violent when it comes to ‘ladai-jhaghde, dange-fasaad, maa-bhen, etc etc’. Largely, these are some of the things KHURKI thinks we always/sometimes/might/already done when we go to purchase a ‘Kandoom’!

Check if ‘Sharma uncle’ or ‘Sheela aunty’ is around!

Bhaiya ‘Durex’…. oops I mean ‘Corex’ dena.


I just came to look for my medicine.

Bhai, Behen, duur ka bhai, duur ki behen

Koi dekh na le yaar.

Wait for the crowd to disperse

These fuckers had to come today itself.

Try some other shop…

Is there any other medical store around?


Look around if anyone’s listening

Wo dekh condom maang raha hai, haha.

Take care not to speak loudly


Try to ignore people if they heard

Every night in my dreams, I see you…I feel you!

Talk on the phone and say ‘haan le raha hoon bhai’

Make sure the phone’s on silent, lest you are caught in the act.

buying condoms

Buy it from a place far from your home

It’s sooooo far away.

buying condoms

Make sure it’s hidden from inquistive eyes

Why the hell are they looking at me? Is there anything wrong with my pocket?

Make sure the flavour’s worth buying

Yeah, that one!

Vishal Kapoor
Vishal Kapoor
Too Extrovert. Writing is not really my thing but doing fine for now ;)


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