“Oh, she’s a nice girl.” You can hear these words often from people around you. But what defines a good or a nice girl? Helping your family with clothes or your friends with right advice? Washing your dishes instead of leaving them in the sink? Doing charity for needy? But all these acts of kindness don’t necessarily define a nice person. Right! To improve your likeabilty, you want to assess yourself honestly. How about listing the behaviour or etiquettes that you can adopt if you also want to be likeable…
Destroy unlikeable qualities of yours
Don’t seek attention. Don’t have an over-sized ego. Control your horrible temper. Don’t be kind one day and mean the next. Don’t be negative about other people and if you find you hardly like anyone or rarely like people, the problem is most likely within you. Get over it. You can be an amazing person — no matter how great you are, you can appreciate others.
Respond to negative feedback
If people don’t seem to be into you for whatever reason, don’t bother. Everyone has their own preferences. Just respond sweetly to their negative feedback.
Like your own sense of humour
If you don’t, then fix that. If you like your own sense of humour, then that will be entertaining for you and you are likely to find others who share your preferences in terms of what’s funny. This will increase the odds that you two will bond.
Open up to everything that’s bothering you
If you don’t share what’s important to you, it’s hard for others to open up and share what’s important to them. So it will be tough for you to bond with others, especially with your colleagues in office and with in-laws.
Be friendly and confident
Get over your shyness if that’s an issue. Introversion is valued to a point by others. It’s harder for others to make the effort in getting to know you if you don’t make the effort back.
Most importantly, don’t judge people
Be courageous. Provide value to others in form of empathy and advice. Share what you know or experiences that you have had that could help the other person. Ask if you can be helpful in any way when potential opportunities come up.
Make other people feel good about themselves
Compliment them. Use the other person’s name in conversation (makes them feel acknowledged).
Be genuinely interested in others
Be engaged in what they have to say. Don’t employ small talk. Listen well. If you can get other people to talk about themselves, they are more likely to like you more. One way to do this is to ask open-ended questions.
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Show positive body language
Smiling at people if you are happy to see them or they say something you that makes you happy (makes them feel liked), eye contact (shows interest), keeping your body and head faced towards the person with whom you are talking or nodding to show agreement and understanding.
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Make the effort
This is a key thing most people just don’t do, whether it’s walking to people at a party or make the effort to call them regularly, etc. Make the effort and show your concern to them.
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