Well if we always thought our serials were too far-fetched, our advertisements aren’t too far either.
When Madhuri Dixit enticingly dances with her kids and then calls out to her staid hubby to join the exercising, “come on …come on”, you think that it’s an ad on fitness and keeping the kids company. But what follows is a scrumptious laid out meal made by mamma dear. She’s hopping effortlessly in her leotards from exercising to cooking.
I’m a mother. I know that either I can dance or I can cook. I’m sure if I try both, then maybe you’ll find me collapsed with my head in the oats noodles bowl.
More than the Katrina Kaifs, Deepikas and Ranbirs, it’s the perfectly glossed people in the advertisements that give you such a reality check that you feel you have failure written all over you. These days another advertisement doing the rounds is of a father taking his infant for a joy ride in his car. The car ride is so soothing that the ‘bachcha’ is blissfully asleep before daddy can take a u-turn to home. Now imagine this in real life! A kiddo asking his father for a ride is likely to be greeted with, “Petrol pump tumhare baap ka hai? Chup chap so jayo ki thappad maar ke sulayun?”
We’re shown cars of all shapes and sizes, cars to suit every pocket gliding sensuously on the roads. You start wondering where the potholes have all disappeared till you realize that the ads are all shot in Corsica or any other fancy place. No ad maker has the guts to shoot a car ad by showing you making a way through teeming crowds, unending potholes and dust and grime.
The funniest ad is when a guy using a 250 rupees deodorant has women swarming over him like bees and mosquitoes. Every guy in this world knows the effort and money that goes into keeping his girlfriend happy. I’m sure in real life, if a guy uses the ‘dhai sau rupay waala deo’ everyday and thinks that this is all that is needed to ‘patao’ the girlfriend, then he’s likely to hear the girl screaming “CHEAPO” at him!
Taking a quick look at all our backyards, you will never see your husband prancing around you like Salman Khan smelling the clothes as you hang them dry. That is so because husbands are so happy that at last they have some free air to breathe before wifey pulls the noose.
Imagine your horror if some stranger barges into your half open bathroom door and pops the most important question to you, “Kya aapke toothpaste main namak hai?” Bhai, tumhe kya lena hai. Hamare dant manjan mein chahe haldi ho chahe mirchi aur chahe garam masala!
But if our ads did come true, it would be so nice to keep our bathroom door open and to find some stranger magically coming and cleaning the toilet seat with “Harpic” just to prove a point. More power to such kind-hearted strangers!
A guy was driving madly on the road. The traffic cop caught up with him. “Sir, I am a learner. I’m learning to drive”. Coming close, the cop saw that the young man was alone and there was no instructor with him. He asked the youth, “Who’s your driving teacher?” The young man proudly said, “Sir, main IIN se seekh raha hun!!!”